Nice rainy night + loud snoring + thoughts keeping me up= BlogTime.
Thoughts in my head:
* I'm in my last month of my 30's. January brings on the big 40.
* I'm very content with most aspects of my life...yet my confidence about some things wanes.
* My "trick" knee/leg have been acting funny. It pisses me off...and the reason i'm most pissed is a little stupid and too vain for me to admit in print right now.
* I think i might need to change blog format.
* freakin Indian Meal moths have INVADED my house and made me a spastic-Tourettes-reacting neurotic nut.
* I dont trust the food industry. I still like the crap they sell though.
* I quit cigarettes. Sometimes i miss them...i won't dwell on that...this is prime-smoking trigger-time
* I love my new job...it's going to take some time to feel the confidence i'd like, though. I really want to pull my weight at the shop and sometimes i don't feel like i am contributing as much as the other artists. It's a time thing: i'm the only one there with a kid.
* I'm become scared of cancer. More now, than when i had it.
* i am also very pissed at cancer now.
To summarize:
I'm an insecure, obsessive, neurotic, paranoid hypochondriac, with a gimp leg and a chip on her shoulder, who lacks confidence, yet switched careers and gave up smoking at the ripe age of 40. Maybe its a good thing i'm scatter-brained and lack focus; I don't really dwell on any of the points and my usual state is happiness..but then there is something to remind me...and distract me.
No wonder i can't sleep.
2 comments:
Those are some heavy thoughts, my friend.
It's funny how you see yourself and how others might see you.
Like when I see you I think of a woman who is full of life, talent, and confidence.
I was going to say something similar to Sonnie. I don't see what you see at all. I see a woman who inspires me, made me laugh, and who I felt lucky to get to hang around with (I felt like the cool kid for once :))
Post a Comment