Nice rainy night + loud snoring + thoughts keeping me up= BlogTime.
Thoughts in my head:
* I'm in my last month of my 30's. January brings on the big 40.
* I'm very content with most aspects of my life...yet my confidence about some things wanes.
* My "trick" knee/leg have been acting funny. It pisses me off...and the reason i'm most pissed is a little stupid and too vain for me to admit in print right now.
* I think i might need to change blog format.
* freakin Indian Meal moths have INVADED my house and made me a spastic-Tourettes-reacting neurotic nut.
* I dont trust the food industry. I still like the crap they sell though.
* I quit cigarettes. Sometimes i miss them...i won't dwell on that...this is prime-smoking trigger-time
* I love my new job...it's going to take some time to feel the confidence i'd like, though. I really want to pull my weight at the shop and sometimes i don't feel like i am contributing as much as the other artists. It's a time thing: i'm the only one there with a kid.
* I'm become scared of cancer. More now, than when i had it.
* i am also very pissed at cancer now.
To summarize:
I'm an insecure, obsessive, neurotic, paranoid hypochondriac, with a gimp leg and a chip on her shoulder, who lacks confidence, yet switched careers and gave up smoking at the ripe age of 40. Maybe its a good thing i'm scatter-brained and lack focus; I don't really dwell on any of the points and my usual state is happiness..but then there is something to remind me...and distract me.
No wonder i can't sleep.
Life after the Sarcoma/ Knee-Bunion Adventure.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
from "Daddy" to "Marilyn"
Today was just one of those days that i can't say "good-night" to, until i recap.
This morning, before i even went to work, i had a FULL day; none of which will pertain to this post....but note-worthy in that i had pretty much had a great day by noon. Little did i know the rest of the day would be a doozy.
Before noon: exercised with Wii, Violin lesson with T, drove 3 young'uns to nursing home field trip, served hot lunch at t's school, nap, shower, work.
Badda Bing, Badda Boom: full day, right? Wrong!
THEN...right after i arrived to work, my first appointment came early and i had to hit the ground running. She was a former student; one of the best I had from "Alcatraz". She entrusted my newbie skills to a sentimental cross, which was commemorating the loss of her father. She had the design ready to go...so i gave her a good deal. We were both happy with how it turned out.
The rest of the day was spent working on various things until the next, and last, fella came in. He came right up to me and said he wanted a tattoo that said "Marilyn" with some dates. He was kinda scruffy and not exactly pleasant in the olfactory department...but he had an itch and was cool with letting an apprentice scratch it.
He was a stocky little dude; I pretty much towered over him. From his clothes, boots and hands, i gathered that he was hard-working; to the point of wearing out the deoderant he may or may not have worn at some point today. He had a few home-made tats, which can typically cause one to make certain assumptions about his life experiences. Based on a brief conversation, involving some pretty creative grammatical slaughtering, I could gather that he probably hadn't been too interested in school. And i won't even go into the dental hygene....or lack thereof.
These were all obvious details that most people see about this guy. All us assholes judging a book by a cover.
In this shop, where this guy felt comfortable to be himself, I got to learn a little more. It turns out that the name he wanted was his mothers name. The dates were her birthday and the day she died. He described a yellow rose for her, the name and the dates...and said he'd been thinking about getting a tattoo since he had been to her funeral...2 months ago. She was buried states away and, since he couldn't visit her headstone in some depressing cemetary far from here, he wanted this tattoo to see everyday.
During the next few hours, I learned more about this guy...and his relationship to his mom. She had left him when he was a kid. As he told me the story, he revisited the pain that caused (and likely still does) as a young boy, but told me how he understood the circumstances in which she left. He later ran away to be with her and, after a turmultuous reunion, he spent his teenage years making up for lost time. He said they were best friends.
Never mind that this guy called his "significant other" his "Old Lady"....and he asked me what my "Old Man" thought about my tattooing. (Santa? Father Time? Who's my Old Man?) He also said things like "I ain't trippin" and called me "Dude". I could look past all that and see the consideration in his forewarned "I'm gonna sweat....and its gonna stink." As crude as that is, i think it was his way of giving me a heads up (noses up) and being considerate.
I don't know; maybe being a mom to a son has made me all sappy. Maybe i've huffed too many B.O fumes and am not thinking straight...but i found it endearing that even this "unsavory" fella missed his mama. His eyes watered when he talked about remembering the sound of her laugh, how he dreamed about her recently....and how he doesn't remember the funeral.
I asked him if she would like the tattoo and he said "Hell, yeah."
We tattooed it on his chest, over his heart.
This morning, before i even went to work, i had a FULL day; none of which will pertain to this post....but note-worthy in that i had pretty much had a great day by noon. Little did i know the rest of the day would be a doozy.
Before noon: exercised with Wii, Violin lesson with T, drove 3 young'uns to nursing home field trip, served hot lunch at t's school, nap, shower, work.
Badda Bing, Badda Boom: full day, right? Wrong!
THEN...right after i arrived to work, my first appointment came early and i had to hit the ground running. She was a former student; one of the best I had from "Alcatraz". She entrusted my newbie skills to a sentimental cross, which was commemorating the loss of her father. She had the design ready to go...so i gave her a good deal. We were both happy with how it turned out.
The rest of the day was spent working on various things until the next, and last, fella came in. He came right up to me and said he wanted a tattoo that said "Marilyn" with some dates. He was kinda scruffy and not exactly pleasant in the olfactory department...but he had an itch and was cool with letting an apprentice scratch it.
He was a stocky little dude; I pretty much towered over him. From his clothes, boots and hands, i gathered that he was hard-working; to the point of wearing out the deoderant he may or may not have worn at some point today. He had a few home-made tats, which can typically cause one to make certain assumptions about his life experiences. Based on a brief conversation, involving some pretty creative grammatical slaughtering, I could gather that he probably hadn't been too interested in school. And i won't even go into the dental hygene....or lack thereof.
These were all obvious details that most people see about this guy. All us assholes judging a book by a cover.
In this shop, where this guy felt comfortable to be himself, I got to learn a little more. It turns out that the name he wanted was his mothers name. The dates were her birthday and the day she died. He described a yellow rose for her, the name and the dates...and said he'd been thinking about getting a tattoo since he had been to her funeral...2 months ago. She was buried states away and, since he couldn't visit her headstone in some depressing cemetary far from here, he wanted this tattoo to see everyday.
During the next few hours, I learned more about this guy...and his relationship to his mom. She had left him when he was a kid. As he told me the story, he revisited the pain that caused (and likely still does) as a young boy, but told me how he understood the circumstances in which she left. He later ran away to be with her and, after a turmultuous reunion, he spent his teenage years making up for lost time. He said they were best friends.
Never mind that this guy called his "significant other" his "Old Lady"....and he asked me what my "Old Man" thought about my tattooing. (Santa? Father Time? Who's my Old Man?) He also said things like "I ain't trippin" and called me "Dude". I could look past all that and see the consideration in his forewarned "I'm gonna sweat....and its gonna stink." As crude as that is, i think it was his way of giving me a heads up (noses up) and being considerate.
I don't know; maybe being a mom to a son has made me all sappy. Maybe i've huffed too many B.O fumes and am not thinking straight...but i found it endearing that even this "unsavory" fella missed his mama. His eyes watered when he talked about remembering the sound of her laugh, how he dreamed about her recently....and how he doesn't remember the funeral.
I asked him if she would like the tattoo and he said "Hell, yeah."
We tattooed it on his chest, over his heart.
Another come-back?
So.....I have a new job at a Casey's Tattoo. I realize it is a huge leap from recent posts, but i don't even know how to catch up writing about it. In fact, the thought of summarizing is so daunting that it has kept me from writing at all. I don't even know where to begin.
I also toyed with the idea of starting another blog--AGAIN? Then i figured that would be like my penchant for buying cookbooks--even though i don't cook!! Just because it's new & exciting doesn't mean i'm actually going to put it to use.
Tonite i just wanted to write, so i threw aside all creative block-obstacles. I reckon i'll stick with this old blog. It's been here for me all this time....
I also toyed with the idea of starting another blog--AGAIN? Then i figured that would be like my penchant for buying cookbooks--even though i don't cook!! Just because it's new & exciting doesn't mean i'm actually going to put it to use.
Tonite i just wanted to write, so i threw aside all creative block-obstacles. I reckon i'll stick with this old blog. It's been here for me all this time....
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